It Won’t Be Like This For Long

I have had a quite a few people ask “how I do it all” since I started this project. The truth is that social media can look anyway that you want it to. And while what I write is a reflection of me, the truth is that some days are SO HARD. Many days I feel like I am drowning. I have self doubt in my skills as a physician, a researcher, a mother, and a human being at times.

Some days I am so tired I don’t know how I will function. In the morning my eyes are heavy and I stumble around until the coffee hits my brain. My nights are so long, filled with a delightful baby that still wants to nurse 1-2 times per night and a 3.5 year old who is being extra clingy and coming to our bed every other night. Dinner, bath and bedtime is more like roulette than a routine. I never know what I am going to get. There are nights with questionable nutrition and personal hygiene, followed by tantrums that will bring anyone to the brink of insanity. But at the end of the day, I know this is all normal and I breathe in their sweet soft scents and settle in to hold them a little bit longer each night as this Darius Rucker song plays through my head:

It won’t be like this for long. Some day soon she’ll be a teenager, and at times he’ll think she hates him. But right now she’s up and crying and the truth is that he don’t mind, as he kisses her good night and she says her prayers. He lays down there beside her, until her eyes are finally closed.

And just watching her it breaks his heart cause he already knows. It wont be like this for long. One day soon that little girl is gonna be all grown up and gone.

This phase is gonna fly by, so he’s trying to hold on. It won’t be like this for long.

” The longer I live, the more beautiful life becomes.” – Frank Lloyd Wright

#ChildhoodCancer365 #morethanfour

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